My Golf Disaster


Although I was never picked for sports teams as a kid, I always thought that golf would be far easier than all the others as it required very little physical exertion in regards to chasing a ball up and down a field for 90 minutes while opponents try to take the legs out from under you.

I mean, how difficult could it be? You stand still, look at the hole at the other end of the green, look at the ball and then hit it as hard as you can with a metal or wooden club. Even better, once you do, you don't have to run as fast as you can to the hole. Instead you take a taxi in the form of a golf cart. How sweet is that!

I had a rude awakening one day when a friend of mine managed to talk me into playing a few rounds down at one of the local courses. For starters there were no golf carts, so we had to walk around all 18 holes. That wouldn't have been so bad but for the fact there were no golf caddies on that day either so we had to carry the bags of clubs around too. Damn those things are heavy! Golf caddy's do not get paid enough.

To make matters worse, it began to rain half way through the game. So there I am, soaked, sore, tired and about to drive my tuft of grass another 100 yards, for that is all I seemed to be hitting all morning.

Someone must have super glued the golf ball to the tee because every time I looked down after swinging that freakin club, there it was, smiling up at me, wondering why I wasn't hitting it. On the few occasions that I did manage to hit it, it made a lovely plopping sound as it hit the water, sinking into the murky depths of the nearest water hazard, never to be seen again.

Or I spent the rest of my time doing a David Attenborough as I searched through the rough long grass (in vein I might add) looking for that elusive white golf ball. I actually managed to find many day glow and colored golf balls on my safari for my own but alas it was never found.

In all I lost 12 golf balls that day but managed to recover 9 multi colored ones that didn't belong to me. This leads me to believe I'm not alone in my inability to hit a golf ball straight. I didn't come across the dead bodies of any lost golfers looking for their own golf balls but I was fully expecting to.

Just when I was about to assign golf to a watery grave by hurling my 9 iron as far across the nearest water hazard as I could, two extremely attractive females came walking over the hill behind us. They too were searching for their lost golf balls. (I swear you couldn't make this stuff up if you were writing a film.)

We exchanged golfing disaster stories and after a bit of chatting decided to retire to the club house for the day to escape the rain and plan a new strategy of attack.

Thanks to my golfing disaster we now have dates for this Friday night and although I caught the cold, lost my balls and was thoroughly pissed off for most of the game. (I was losing a bet with my friend) I can't help but feel that meeting girls at a stadium of 90,000 screaming fans just would not have happened.

Although I'm still useless at golf, my opinion of the sport has changed completely. Not only for obvious reasons but I've come to learn there is a great deal of skill required to hit a ball straight with a bent club in a cross wind.

So the next time you laugh at the poor guy or girl who is hitting a golf club into the ground repeatedly, show them a little sympathy as they may be at the end of their teather. And the next time you see a pro sink a ball in 2 shots, stand in awe at the amount of time, patience and effort they must have put in to their game to become THAT good.

Jack Crow is a freelance writer and part time golfer. When he's not writing articles he's trying to improve his golf swing at his local course. To read golfing tips and secrets he has discovered visit: Golf


MORE RESOURCES:

USA TODAY

Nine reasons Tiger will rule golf again -- or not
USA TODAY
By Steve DiMeglio, USA TODAY By Allan Henry, US Presswire By Allan Henry, US Presswire As Tiger Woods makes his 2012 PGA Tour debut Thursday in the AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am, golf's unquestioned leading man and top draw once again is at the ...
The sunshine boys of Pebble BeachSan Francisco Chronicle
Some Celebrities Play for Real, Not LaughsNew York Times
For Spencer Levin, father knows bestESPN
Houston Chronicle -Reuters
all 1,643 news articles »


Press-Enterprise

GOLF: Temecula's Michaels gets season started Down Under
Press-Enterprise
Never mind that the girl who once starred on the Temecula Linfield Christian boys golf team now is a full-fledged member of the LPGA Tour — this week she's literally come a long way for her first start in her what will be her first full year on women ...
LPGA season begins with more events, optimismSan Francisco Chronicle
The 10 LPGA stories worth wishing forESPN
Dominant Tseng still trying to improveBangkok Post

all 240 news articles »


Auckland stuff.co.nz

Kemp, Lewis lead women's Open golf
Sydney Morning Herald
Since being branded the next Australian women's golf superstar, reality has not matched expectation for Sydney's Sarah Kemp. On Thursday the 26-year-old gave a glimpse of her talent when she claimed a share of the lead after the first round of the ...
Lewis, Kemp top Women's Australian OpenSTLtoday.com
Golf: Kemp and Lewis lead Australian Women's OpenLeader News
Kemp and Lewis share the lead at Royal MelbourneABC Online
The Canberra Times -Auckland stuff.co.nz -ESPN
all 272 news articles »


7Live

Clint Eastwood is launching a golf network
Washington Post (blog)
But apparently he has room for yet another job: launching a golf lifestyle channel. According to the Hollywood Reporter, the Academy Award winner and avid golfer has been named creative board chairman and founding shareholder of the Back9 Network, ...
Clint Eastwood to help create new TV golf channelUSA TODAY (blog)
Clint Eastwood's Next Project: New Golf Network (Exclusive)Hollywood Reporter
Culture Pop: Clint Eastwood to launch golf network7Live
Daily Caller -New York Post
all 15 news articles »


Golf tournament returns to Marana, changes for spectators
Explorer News
For those attending the World Golf Championships Accenture Match Play Championship this year, there will be a few changes. All the changes are being made in the best interest of the spectators, including parking, cellphones and walking along the course ...
This week offers the final chance for players to qualifyPGA Tour
Who's on the bubble for the Accenture Match Play Championship?The Desert Sun

all 5 news articles »


Golf Clap for Waste Connections
msnbc.com
By Seth Jayson For the quarter ended Dec. 31 (Q4), Waste Connections met expectations on revenue and met expectations on earnings per share. Compared to the prior-year quarter, revenue increased and GAAP earnings per share expanded.

and more »


Chicago Tribune

Butler National looks to break barrier
Chicago Tribune
Butler National Golf Club is strongly considering opening its doors to women, a move that could bring major championships to Chicago and would mark a major cultural shift for the 40-year-old institution. Industry sources told the Tribune the iconic Oak ...

and more »


Golf show returns to the Greater Philadelphia Expo Center in Oaks
The Times Herald
And with so many warm, sunny days in a winter that's largely been playing hooky, the Philadelphia Golf Show has the best marketing tactic it could possibly ask for to attract an estimated 20000-plus links-hungry types to its annual event at the Greater ...
Expo teams up with Boys & Girls ClubProvidence Eyewitness News

all 2 news articles »


New York Daily News

Man kills Chihuahua with golf club, hit it 'as if driving a ball off its tee ...
New York Daily News
By Nancy Dillon / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS A California man was busted for killing a tiny chihuahua with his golf club, hitting it like a ball on a tee, authorities say. A Southern California man who allegedly killed a miniature 6-pound dog by teeing off on ...
SoCal Man Charged After Fatally Using Chihuahua As Golf BallLAist
California man accused of killing Chihuahua with golf clubFox News
Animal cruelty charges to be filed in Chihuahua golf club deathLos Angeles Times

all 217 news articles »


Daily Mail

Robert Rock looking for win in Dubai after beating Tiger Woods in Abu Dhabi
Washington Post
DUBAI, United Arab Emirates — After beating Tiger Woods at the Abu Dhabi Golf Championship, rising star Robert Rock says he no longer fears playing against the big names. Good thing. He's paired with US Open champion Rory McIlroy and defending ...
Rock confident heading into Dubai after winFox News
Abu Dhabi HSBC Golf Champion Robert Rock speaks high of Tiger Woods' golfing ...bettor.com (blog)
Rory McIlroy reveals how he used to hunt Tiger WoodsESPN.co.uk

all 211 news articles »

Google News

home | site map
© 2006